Each day Stuart spends about three hours questioning me as to what happened to his Daddy. The first hour of his day and then again for up to two hours before he goes to sleep. Many of the same questions are gone over in depth and detail again and again mainly checking that "Papa" is dead and why the doctors could not help him and why he cannot return.
Then during the day come the new ideas on how we can possibly help him and the concerns as to whether he is hungry or cold. An anxious little face saying "if we give the doctors more money maybe they can fix Papa" or "I love Daddy so much, I need to hug him" can put out the stars; crack my heart.
We are following the advice of councillors and Hospice who state for his age group he is doing exactly as expected. He also questions our close friends and family to see if they will come up with the same answer or be able to provide a new one. They were so close, Duncan who had been orphaned twice as a child, took his parenting role very seriously and was a wonderful father. My heart breaks thinking of all that he will miss of Stuart growing up and all that Stuart will miss growing up without him in his life.